Healing Relational Trauma: What No One Tells You

Healing from relational trauma isn’t about controlling other people — it’s about reclaiming your power.

In this reflective and personal episode, I explore one of the hardest lessons in trauma recovery: healing doesn’t mean others will always treat you with respect or kindness. We can’t control other people’s behaviour, but we can learn to recognize red flags, set boundaries, and protect our well-being with clarity and strength.

I share six core truths that I’ve discovered through both lived experience and my work as a trauma counsellor and coach:

1. Healing is about focusing on what’s within your control.
2. Healing doesn’t guarantee love — but it’s still worth it.
3. Healing doesn’t protect you from new wounds.
4. Sometimes healing means letting go of people you love.
5. You’re allowed to disagree with your therapist.
6. Self-trust comes before trusting others.

You’ll hear stories of heartbreak, growth, and the quiet, powerful wisdom that comes from trauma recovery. 

This episode is for anyone who's ever asked:

• Why hasn’t all this healing led to the relationships I want?
• Is it okay to walk away from someone I love?
• How do I trust myself when others question my truth?

If you’ve ever been made to feel "too much" or "not enough," this is for you. Healing won’t guarantee a fairytale ending, but it will help you come home to yourself — with self-respect, groundedness, and the courage to move through life on your terms.

Note: This episode includes a brief mention of suicide. If you are in crisis or need support and live in Canada, here are some resources:

• Crisis Services Canada: https://988.ca/ | Call or text 9-8-8
• First Nations and Inuit Hope for Wellness Helpline: https://www.hopeforwellness.ca/ | 1-855-242-3310
• Trans Lifeline Canada: 877-330-6366
• If you live outside of Canada, please check the resources in the country you live in. 

Want to learn more about healing trauma? Here are some ideas:

• Adults with childhood trauma: How to heal and reclaim your life: https://brighthorizontherapies.com/blog/adults-with-childhood-trauma/
• What is the difference between trauma and complex trauma: https://brighthorizontherapies.com/blog/what-is-the-difference-between-trauma-and-complex-trauma/

Further resources

If you’d like to explore more about trauma recovery and my work, here are some ways to connect:

• Discover more about my work: https://brighthorizontherapies.com/
• Follow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/brighthorizontherapies/
• Send me a message or share your thoughts: nat@brighthorizontherapies.com

Trauma Demystified is not intended to replace professional guidance, support, medical treatment, or therapy. Please feel free to consult your physician or a mental health professional for any questions about mental health symptoms.

Bright Horizon Therapies is located in the Treaty 7 region in Southern Alberta, which includes the Blackfoot Confederacy, the Tsuut’ina First Nation, and the Stoney Nakoda. This land is also home to Métis Nation of Alberta, Region III. I acknowledge the traditional caregivers of the land and the importance of a commitment to the continued decolonization of my work.

Chapters

• 0:00 Why these conversations matter
• 3:03 Healing is about focusing on what’s within your control.
• 7:48 Healing doesn’t guarantee love — but it’s still worth it.
• 11:50 Healing doesn’t protect you from new wounds.
• 15:02 Sometimes healing means letting go of people you love.
• 20:10 You’re allowed to disagree with your therapist.
• 22:33 Self-trust comes before trusting others.